Let’s turn that statement into a question….. who is the most important person? Who is the centre of your world? YOU are – in your world, I AM – in mine. Is that okay? Of course it is! It has to be – you are the only one that has your thoughts, makes your decisions, lives your life, travels along your path. You are the centre of your Universe! 

Why is it important to recognise this? It’s important because when you are in harmony with yourself, you are in harmony with everything! So it’s important for you to get you right for you. You being in harmony with you then radiates outward and will reflect back harmony to you. 

Most of us have an awareness of this, but how many of us understand this ‘harmonic resonance’ in relation to other people? I often say to my clients – “You can’t give what you don’t have!”. If you are tired, how can you give energy, support to another? If you don’t care for yourself, how can you care for another? 

If you don’t truly love yourself, can you truly love another?……..

So let’s look at some tools to help. I credit the bellow information to a dear colleague who showed it to me when I was upset about another. In that moment my colleague noticed I was not in harmony with myself and I was broadcasting that disharmony outward!  So not right in my world! The ‘YOU WORLD’ is offered for you to reflect upon and is only a small part of the toolkit we all need to call upon at different times.

I started this blog by introducing that you are the centre of your world. In the ‘YOU WORLD’ – you are the centre of YOUR WORLD. Everything revolves around YOU. YOU take responsibility for YOU, YOU are accountable for YOU- no-one else. What makes YOU  –  YOU, is up to YOU!

The next circle is for your LOVER – they are in close proximity because they have the greatest influence over YOU as regards to your decisions, shared experiences, values, life journey etc. To put someone in that highly prestigious circle, you need to decide what criteria they must fulfil to have that position. What makes a LOVER, a LOVER to YOU? What are your list of words? –  Integrity, passion, honestly, reliability etc. You can write this out on a piece of paper. Your list is your own and can be long or short, and can change!

Do the same process with SPOUSE. Your criteria may be similar to LOVER, or you could add some more or less. It’s up to YOU. Your criteria for why you put that person in that circle is personal to you. SPOUSE is a little further removed and so will have a little less influence and impact over YOU.

Repeat the above process for each of the circles going outward: FAMILY, FRIENDS, ASSOCIATES. Again you might have similar criteria or different. YOU decide.

The OTHERS category is outside the circle for good reason – it’s a BIG group! It is for people, organisations, institutions that have NO influence over you, therefore they DO NOT get to determine how you are to feel, act, live or be!!! They are NOT in your circle of influence.

Back to my introduction to this tool…..

My issue was with someone who I had put into the ASSOCIATE circle.  I had my list of criteria that were not being met by this person, hence my upset and frustration. I was shown that I had misplaced this person into the ASSOCIATE circle, when they should have been put in the OTHERS category. I was wasting my energy on someone that had absolutely no influence over me. I didn’t associate, socialise, speak or communicate with them at all. So why did I put them in a category where they could not meet my criteria? I had a faulty perception of their role in my life. 

Solution:  In my mind’s eye (or you could draw this out on paper), I lovingly thanked them for their service and escorted them out the door of ASSOCIATE and through the door of OTHERS, and closed the door behind them!

After that experience I no longer had any emotional charge when thinking or hearing about this person. I bet they felt better too!